* My MySpace account was hacked! I don’t know what that entails, but I thought you should know in case any naughty things happened. *
The past weekend was the extreme-sports version of performing songwriter. On Friday I left Bolinas not a moment too soon, as local roads were soon flooded! My exhaustion/weather-anxiety got me all sorts of turned around and I was quite surprised to find myself cruising over the Golden Gate Bridge – not exactly the direction of Salem, OR….
However, the gods were smiling upon me – drool and all – and after a butt-numbing 12-hour drive through sleet, rain, and snow, I pulled up at The Blue Pepper right at 7PM. It was nothing short of a miracle. The show went very well, as did the show in Portland the following night. Though, on my way to Portland late Friday night an unidentifiable animal dashed in front of my car and missed my bumper by centimeters! Probably the scariest moment of the trip – so far. It was too big to be a dog… kind of shaggy like a sheep (but I’ve never seen a sheep run that fast!)… cream-colored. Any thoughts?
Portland is a very friendly town. It’s the kind of tap-them-on-the-shoulder-and-they’ll-give-you-a-smile kind of friendly, rather than a welcome wagon friendly. Which I like. Maybe it’s that Northern boundary thing that I’m used to. I like a little space (understatement). Whatever it is, it’s an authentic kindness, even towards a non-polka-dot-or-stripe-wearing non-smoker like me. That’s a lot of hyphens right there. The coffeehouse music is downright depressing, though.
I stayed on in Portland a couple extra nights because of threatening weather, which keeps getting pushed further and further down the week. Very frustrating. I’d rather have no forecast than a worthless forecast. Which brings me to my Plan For A Better World…
After three days of basically flipping between the Weather Channel and “Ballot Bowl 08″ (thank god for people like Stephen Colbert and John Stewart) I’m really sick of people talking about “change change change” and then not really SAYING anything or offering any specific plans for change. There’s more fluff coming from the mouths of (most of) these candidates than the clouds above the Cascades. So I’ve been thinking about explicit things that would better the world, or at least the road world:
* Each lane of the highway should have a designated cruise control speed, which would result in seamless, stress-free driving.
* All gas pumps should have that little lever on the handle which allows for warm car sanctuary while fueling, granted that no one abuses this privilege by spending a half an hour ogling beef jerky inside the food mart and holding up the filling line.
* Trucks must obey lane restrictions, and ideally have their own lanes with dividers. This way we can still share the road, but I won’t freak out on those mountain passages.
* Fruits, vegetables, and bakeries in gas station food marts.
* Hot water dispensers built into dashboards like Tim Allen’s cocoa dispenser in “Santa Clause” (a person could choose coffee, cocoa, tea, etc). Hmmm… a rice cooker would be nice, too.
* People who refuse to use the left lane for passing, or worse – those who clog it – should be tagged and confined to separate (unpaved) roads, along with people who don’t use turn signals and people who drive at erratic speeds.
* All restrooms must have hot water, soap, and a hands-free way to exit.
* No vanity plates should be allowed, for the collective self-respect of our species (TUNE GUY? YOGINI? NTR BOY?!)
* And, of course, accurate, up-to-the-minute weather and interstate advisories on the radio, web, and television – at all times! I don’t want to watch your kids making snowmen when I am trying to figure out whether or not I’m headed for an avalanche!!!
Ok. Now that that’s out of the way – There are lots of cool nooks in Portland. My favorite thing about the city is Powell’s City of Books. Wow, I was ready to move in! The perfect place for a cold and rainy day, or a sunny day for that matter. I picked up a bunch of books and an audiobook for the long haul back to CA this Friday. But first – I’m playing in Bellingham, WA Thursday night! I’m very excited because this is my first time in Oregon and Washington. I feel a certain wholeness now… like I’ve been staring at a puzzle with the upper-left-hand chunk missing, and now I have the satisfaction of clicking in those pieces. The four corners.
All-in-all life is good, despite the wasted hours on CNN and WTC. I’ve been particularly upset about the recent death of the young man that’s been all over the news. Right now some people on TV are talking about this “breaking news” involving an US Weekly report and drugs, and it’s all pretty sickening. Aside from the fact that US Weekly is not exactly the most reliable news source, I’m wondering – if drugs are involved in someone’s death, does that make it less tragic? Is that individual all of a sudden deserving – even guilty – of his fate – the hounding, the prying, the loss? Should we be less mournful? I am endlessly amazed by our capacity to turn on a person. It is so, so tragic.
Well, I don’t really want to end on such a sad note, but I don’t want to glaze over it either, so I’ll leave you with some pictures. Stay warm and dry, unless you’re reading from Sydney or something, in which case please send me a one-way ticket from Seattle.


































